Loneliness and (the Feeling of) Belonging

Being alone and feeling lonely are two different things.

Being alone simply means no one is physically with You. You can be alone and feel completely content. You can also lie next to Your partner or be surrounded by people and feel deeply lonely.

I thought the solution to loneliness was belonging to someone or being part of a community.

Then I became part of a wonderful Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu community. I had great people around me, made close friends, and knew there were people who genuinely cared about me.

Yet I still experienced loneliness.

When I read a book that touched on this topic, I came across an insight that changed my perspective:

It’s not about belonging.

It’s about FEELING that You belong.

You don’t need to constantly give, help, achieve, or prove why You deserve a place in Life. Your pure existence is proof that You belong here.

How to stop feeling lonely?

Contribute and allow others to contribute to You. Accept help and support others. Surround Yourself with people who are grateful for Your existence without expecting anything from You in return.

You may simply be.

If You feel lonely, start small. Go somewhere regularly where You share an interest with others. Start a conversation. Invite someone for coffee. Ask for help when You need it. Offer support when You can. Connection grows through participation, giving and receiving.

The more You feel that You belong, the more You attract Your kind of people.

Happiness Is Your Decision ☀️